Roommates. God bless 'em. You love 'em, hate 'em, don't understand 'em, respect 'em, teach 'em, learn from 'em, annoy 'em and miss 'em.
I learned a lot about myself in college, which I attribute to my roommates (good opportunity for a shout out: Erin, Lynn, Katelyn, Lindsey, Lynley- you're the bomb.com) You go your whole life doing things a certain way. You learn a specific routine that you don't deviate from and certain habits you aren't aware of. Much of this is because while growing up, there are 3 other people in your house that do the exact same things. You think that all families keep the medicine in the hall closet, wash the toilet with a washrag, and eat fried spam and potatoes for dinner. I was blown away when I went to college and found out people clean counters with Windex! Eat macaroni out of mixing bowls! And shave everyday! Who are these people? I eventually loosened up and realized there are hundreds of right ways to do everyday things.
I thought I had become so self-enlightened facing adversity, until I got married. HELLO!
I transitioned from college roommate to a roommate for life. You don't just share the living room, kitchen and mailbox anymore. You share.....everything! The difference is when you get annoyed, you can't just go to your room and avoid the problem. You share the same room! I knew it would be a lot of togetherness and a lot of change, which I was excited about, but I thought this lesson would be a gradual one. Wrong.
I forgot my toothbrush on our honeymoon. This meant for the first week of marriage we brushed our teeth with the same toothbrush. Gross! Call it a forgetfulness or coincidence. I like to think God knew how "independent" (or stubborn) we both are and was teaching us the "togetherness thing" right of the bat. I guess it didn't take right away, or maybe it's a series, because He is still teaching the same lesson...
Whatever you want to call it: modification, change, compromise, humility. Numerous adjustments have been made on both parts. These changes may seem small, but are significantly huge when it alters the daily routine you have perfected over 24 years. I am happy to make these changes, the reward is great. However, my pride often gets in the way of my good intentions. Stupid pride. I have to remember it's the little things that go a long way. Some of these "little things" are pretty funny so I thought I would share a few on our top 10 list...
Top 10 Adjustments Post Marriage
D's Adjustments:
1. Cutting a grilled cheese into four equal squares before serving it.
2. Seeing a stuffed bird every morning when I wake up since my roommate likes to keep his mounted quail on his nightstand.
3. Holding the black olives on my shared pizza orders.
4. Being sure to suction the shower curtain liner to the shower wall (in 4 spots) so a drop of water doesn't potentially get out.
5. Hanging up shirts with the hanger facing to the left.
6. Unplugging my straightener instead of leaving it connected to the wall all day, every day.
7. Using dishtowels as napkins.
8. Washing more clothes.
9. Using florescent lighting. I like to only use lamp lighting. I think I get that from my grandparents (thanks gma Flo). My roommate likes to "see what he's eating."
10. Swimming in the pool rather than just laying out beside it.
T's Adjustments:
1. Waking up with "sore ears" due to my roommate's need for the ceiling fan on every night.
2. Lifting the toilet seat instead of it conveniently being left up from earlier use.
3. Finding humor in the fact my roommate brushes her teeth in bed.
4. Having to carefully select hangers from the closet since my roommate has her own white plastic ones she won't let anyone else use.
5. Trying anything green. So far: salad, broccoli, spinach.
6. Climbing over hair dryer and straightener cords every morning to get to the sink.
7. Sleeping on the edge of the bed with a corner of comforter. Did I mention the fan is always on?
8. Not being able to find a clock to tell time since my roommate likes to rearrange the bookshelves on a weekly basis.
9. Getting out of the shower to step on a damp rug when my roommate showers before me.
10. Closing the shower curtain every time I get out of the shower.
Our small group is going through a book called "Sacred Marriage" by Gary Thomas. Gary says "if you want to be free to serve Jesus, it's better not to be married, but if you want to become more like Jesus, its best to be married." I was appalled when I first read this, but realized he is saying if you want free time to serve the Lord only, more availability comes with the single life. However, self-denial and servanthood come with a Godly marriage.
We are finding this to be true everyday. Love and respect come in many forms. Today it meant drying off my feet when I got out of the shower, hanging up his shirt on a sacred plastic hanger and telling that stuffed bird "good morning"
Love!